How do we get through our trials, and not just squeak by, but grow and become more than we were before?
That's the 100 million dollar question in this day and age. Allow me to share two different approaches. These come from a talk given by Carol Wilkinson at BYU that my mother shared with me a few years ago. It helped me change the way I was responding to my challenges the first time I read it. It did so again when it fell out of a folder that I had taken out from my memory box a couple of weeks ago. 
In her speech, Carol explains the following:
Our Father in Heaven wants us to become like Him, and in so doing He wants us to overcome the world and influence of Satan. Difficulties in life allow us to find out how much we need the divine strength and love of our Father. As we reach out to God, we can find and experience His goodness and want to be like Him. Satan also wants us to be like him-evil and miserable-and so he seeks to overcome us and thwart us. Elder Henry B. Eyring said, "The great test of life is...not to endure storms, but to choose the right while they rage."

As difficulties come into our lives, there are two ways to approach them. The first leads to allowing yourself to be influenced and overcome by Satan. It consists of not exhibiting any faith, ignoring spiritual promptings, and refusing to seek for divine help and instead relying on your own abilities. When difficulties come and they're not resolved quickly, you may just feel extremely irritated. 
It consists of the following steps.
Step 1: Your plan is thwarted; you become baffled and questioning
Step 2: Faith doesn't bring the desired results; you become hurt and doubtful
Step 3: You set conditions
Step 4: Your desire is not met; you become angry, bitter and rebellious

The second approach leads to overcoming the world and the influence of Satan through having faith in Christ. With this we are obedient, plead for help and exhibit faith. 
It consists of the following steps:
Step 1: Your plan is thwarted; you trust God and ask different questions.
Things are not going according to your plan. You don't understand why things are going wrong. You know Heavenly Father could solve the problem, as He is omnipotent. Yet you don't know the meaning of all things, so, remembering times when He has come through for you in the past, you decide to absolutely trust in God.
Step 2: Faith doesn't bring desired results; you ask for strength
When your faith doesn't bring the results you desire and you struggle with the trial, your need to ask for strength. I love that she doesn't say that your should pray for strength, but that you need to, you must pray for strength.  This is so important, and I realized that it was okay for me to pray for strength, in fact, that Heavenly Father wanted to give it to me, I just needed to ask for it.
Step 3: You are not consumed with the trial; you focus on the good things in your life
Focus on the good things in your life, not what you don't have.  Choose to be happy. This puts our happiness in our own court, for I do believe that to a certain extent, how we feel is our choice.
Step 4: You consecrate your life to God; you draw closer to Him
Continue to feast on the word of God and have faith. Be willing to spend more time with God; desire it with all your heart. Make the time to pray fervently while being willing to submit to His will, serve Him by serving others, spend time in meaningful meditation, and attend the temple with a worshipful attitude.

Shining individuals who are sensitive to others who are struggling-sensitive because of he pain they've felt, which helps them know better how to succor others-mirror in a very small way the way Christ succors us. Ultimately, through this process, we can become one with Him and our Father. So we become like Him and then overcome the world through faith in our Savior.




I think it is imperative that we realize that Satan is the one influencing us to choose approach number 1. Here's a good question to ask yourself when you are going through, well, anything: Whose agenda is this supporting?  If we are angry with the Lord because of what's going on in our lives, we are supporting Satan's agenda; we are giving in to him, exactly what he wants! I hope that in responding to our trials we will each choose to have faith, trust in our Father in Heaven absolutely, ask for strength, focus on the good, and draw closer to Him. 

Lots of Love,

Wow, it has been a very crazy month! I have had so many experiences that have been both overwhelming and an answer to my prayers all at the same time. First off, I have been dating a young man, who I thought in the beginning, was my Mr. Right. But, as we continued to date and as I continued to get to know him, I realized that we both wanted different things. For starters, I am not sure he truly even wants to be in a relationship. I realized he was being selfish and only thinking of himself, not making me one of his top priorities. He was more concerned about his material things than he was in building a strong relationship. It was through dating him that I realized I was looking for all of the wrong things. I wanted somebody who was done with school and who I knew could provide for me. Of course I wanted someone who could make me laugh and the happiest person on Earth. Someone who would do whatever they could to spend time with me and learn and grow together in unity. But, my focus was on the wrong things. So, as I have prayed and pondered these things, an old boyfriend kept popping into my mind. Finally I called him up and asked him out to frozen yogurt. Things went incredibly well and I realized that in a year and half since dating him, I have grown through experience and have learned so much. Matthew treats me like a princess. He wants to do whatever he can to make me happy. He is incredibly easy to talk to and can make me laugh. He does whatever he can to make time for me, even in his busy life. He makes me feel special and treats me like I am the daughter of a King. He is all of the things I want in my future spouse and I know that with him, we can grow as one in unity.
Matthew only lives 8 minutes away from my work. This is such a blessing since we work completely opposite of one another on most days. I am also blessed with flexible lunches, so I head to his house to eat. We make time for one another. There is effort from both ends and this is the way a relationship is supposed to work. We both want to make the time and we DO make the time to see each other as often as we can! I am just lucky that he is still around after a year and a half!

I am so grateful for the hard things in life that make us stronger, the challenges that make us better people. I am grateful for my Heavenly Father and the knowledge I have that I can go to Him in time of need. He guides and directs me and knows the experiences I must have in order to understand things of the future. I am so happy now and I know that things will work out.

"But the Lord knoweth all things from the beginning; wherefore, he prepareth a way to accomplish all his works among the children of men; for behold he hath all power unto the fulfilling of all his words. And thus it is. Amen" (1Nephi 9:6)

This Wednesday I had an appt. with my GI doc in which we decided I would undergo another endoscopy in a couple of weeks due to more (yes, more) gut issues I've been having the past several months.  We've been digging this whole time for what exactly is causing the problem. I've made some lifestyle changes and tried different medications to see if they would remedy the situation, but none of them have.  I wasn't sure how the wheels in my beloved Dr. Sossenheimer's head would be turning and what he would suggest but felt I needed to go in with an open mind and trust in his expertise as to what to do.

Last week I underwent my 9th surgery (5 within the past 2 years)...
* Ear Tubes * Appendix * Gallbladder * KneeX3 * Jaw-Bilateral * Hernia RepairX2 *
I haven't had the best of luck when it come to my health ever since I turned 16. It seems my life was absolutely perfect up until this point, when I moved away from what I called home, Austin, Texas. Life was great, my gymnastics couldn't have been better as I was on the road to accomplishing my goals and dreams of being a member of the US Gymnastics Team. I loved school, I had a great group of friends and my ward was awesome - life was just dandy.
Then, all at once, it seemed, I was faced with trial after trial. My health went downhill, I spent weeks upon weeks in the hospital. I didn't have a normal junior or senior year, spending much of my time with a tutor in a hospital bed instead of a normal high school classroom. My family moved and then moved again, 6x in 4 years. I watched my younger brother go down the wrong path. My gymnastics dreams were slipping away as I lost strength and skill, then, just when I thought I was getting back on track, I blew out my knee. I haven't completed college as quickly as I planned because of these set backs. This is just a small glimpse of everything I had to deal with.
But these years are behind me and as I look back on all I have dealt with, it is hard to believe all that I have been through and conquered. I look at the person I am today...

I am stronger.
I am braver.
I am more aware of how much the Lord loves me.
I better understand the power of the atonement.
My testimony has been strengthened with every challenge.
I am more understanding and willing to serve those around me.
I am a better person and have had the power to overcome trials through my Savior, Jesus Christ.

I love the following quote....

The black keys have strengthened me to become who I am today. They have brought meaning and purpose into my life. Without them, I wouldn't have been able to create a beautiful masterpiece. Without the black keys in our life, without the sadness, heartache, and challenges, we cannot grow to become more like our Heavenly Father. Our life becomes more meaningful and more beautifully perfected as we are given challenges to overcome. The beauty is, we aren't left to endure and bare these hard times alone; Heavenly Father is with us all along the way.

"And it came to pass that the voice of the Lord came to them in their afflictions, saying: Lift up your heads and be of good comfort...
"And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage....and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions." -Mosiah 24:13-14

Last weekend was amazing! I look forward to conference weekend every fall and spring and it always goes by way too fast! This gospel is true! The words spoken by our prophet, the general authorities and all the leaders of this church, speak through our Heavenly Father. They are here to guide and protect us in such a world of unrest, disappointment, and trial. They give us hope and light the path for us to find happiness here on Earth as we make our way back to our Heavenly Father. President Thomas S. Monson is an amazing prophet. He shows concern for the Lords children all over the world and brings comfort as he testifies of the things which we should do. As he closed Sunday evening, he stated:

"Let us be of good cheer as we go about our lives. Although we live in increasingly perilous times, the Lord loves us and is mindful of us. He is always on our side as we do what is right. He will help us in time of need. Difficulties come into our lives, problems we do not anticipate and which we would never choose. None of us is immune. The purpose of mortality is to learn and to grow to be more like our Father, and it is often during the difficult times that we learn the most, as painful as the lessons may be. Our lives can also be filled with joy as we follow the teachings of the gospel of Jesus Christ."

"We offer our heartfelt gratitude to all who have participated in any way. The truths of the gospel have been beautifully taught and reemphasized. As we take the messages of the past two days into our hearts and into our lives, we will be blessed." 

"And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.
"And it came to pass that so great was their faith and their patience that the voice of the Lord came unto them again, saying: Be of good comfort, for on the morrow I will deliver you out of bondage." Mosiah 24:15-16


For the past 9 months, I have been studying for my PTC (personal training certificate) test. When I first began, I didn't know how to study the material I was handed. My brain wasn't functioning the way that it was supposed to. Let me back up a little bit....
In February of 2009, I was involved in an ice skating accident. I fell forward while trying to attempt a Walze Jump, smacking my head on the ice. One quick ambulance ride and 9 hours later, I woke up in ICU. Thats right, the blow to my head knocked me cold for 9 hours. I don't remember a thing. It took some digging to figure out who I was since I didn't have my ID with me and I was alone. Luckily there was a girl there who recognized me from class, first miracle. The paramedics called my Aunt Sandi who happened to have the whole Inkley clan at her home for a sibling dinner and they were able to contact my mom this way, miracle number 2. The whole family drove down to see how I was doing but the doctors weren't saying much. They were all pretty much preparing for the worst. After scans and tests, they confirmed there was no bleeding in my brain, no fractures, and that I suffered a major concussion with a moderate brain injury...third miracle considering it could have been a LOT worse! I had to drop most of my classes that semester and was out of work for a little over 6 weeks. I basically had to allow time for my brain to heal. I attended therapy and rested a lot! because of this injury, I have had jaw issues including surgery, continuing headaches and migraines, and I have had to re-learn new ways of studying.

I have been given a priesthood blessing that I will make a full recovery and that I would be ok. It has been almost 4 years and I am still fighting the symptoms caused by this traumatic fall. I decided during my last fall semester I needed to go back to therapy. I was put on a wait list and didn't get in until after I had already begun this course through NASM. By this time I was so frustrated and nothing was sticking. I didn't know how to study and was running out of options. Ally, my therapist at TOSH Neurology has been great! She helped me get back on track and has geven me ways to work on improving my short term memory, multi-tasking, and other little study tips.
Over the summer I became distracted. I have never been the one to take courses through the summer. It is my favorite season and I just enjoy playing and going on vacation and having fun. Well, I started this internship in June, plus I was trying to study like mad. This didn't give me much time to have fun for myself. I missed our bear lake trip! I feel as though I have been studying non-stop, and the time has finally come. My test is just around the corner. I was supposed to be taking it as we speak, but the testing center somehow didn't get me on their schedule, so now I am taking it Tuesday morning. This gives me more time to study and prepare, however, now I have to take time off work to do it. But the more I think about it, this was a blessing. I really wasn't ready to take it today and now I have more time to really get down the things I need to know to be successful...
I have prayed for strength and understanding of what I am supposed to learn. I have prayed for an increased knowledge as I put in the time and effort and discover new ways of studying. I have had to work at it and as I do my part, I know my Heavenly Father will bless me. 
This week, I have had many other wonderful things happen...I got approved to refinance my car and this has been a HUGE blessing in my life. I have made many mistakes when it has come to buying cars and I am learning my lesson...the hard way. But now I know what NOT to do when it comes to buying a new car. I also successfully passed my CPR and AED training and am certified! That was such a great feeling of success! Just the thing I needed to boost my confidence knowing that I CAN DO THIS! The Lord is there in time of need! I have felt his presence so strongly in the past couple of weeks as I have moved my scripture study time to the morning. It is a great way to start my day and this way I know I will have time for it. 

"If you put Jesus Christ first, he will tell you what comes second."

Well, I have to get back to studying, but stay tuned for more....I have plenty more to share relating to general conference! 

Here's a post from my personal blog that I wanted to share on Look Up! I originally posted it on February 24, 2012.

My souvenirs from the E.R. (Har, har, har.)

What a week! Some of you know that I began experiencing severe-and I'm talkin' E.X.T.R.E.M.E!!!-abdominal pain last Wednesday afternoon that sent me to the Emergency Room.  This was a complication of some problems I've had for the last month.  After a few tests, several vials of blood, and a bunch of poking and prodding from a very ornery nurse, I was sent home with no conclusive answers as to what was wrong.  I had hope that the worst was over only to get home and become violently ill.  No need to paint you all a picture of what happened but it was wicked.  I hadn't been sick like that since I had an intestinal infection six years ago.
After 24 more hours and 45 trips to the bathroom, I was back in the ER because I couldn't keep anything down and was dehydrated.  They released me just after midnight and I went home to get 5 hours of unsettled sleep before it was time to be up and back to IMC for an abdominal MRI.  Man, was I tired. And not only me, my dear mother, who was sick with a nasty cold herself, was exhausted.
Thankfully my MRI came back normal, but I still don't know what's wrong with me.  Since last week the possibilities have been narrowed down to a few options. It will take a few weeks to talk to doctors, get tests scheduled and completed, and get results.
Through the first few days of this latest trial, I was very scared.  I was feeling pain I'd never felt before, sickness that I hadn't had in years, and my thoughts couldn't get off all the bad that was happening to me in that moment.  My mind zoomed in on the past, where my illness had lasted 3 months, to the future, where I thought I was never going to get better, where nothing would ever change.  I was anxious, and I struggled with the fact that I couldn't feel the spirit and felt like God had once again abandoned me.  How can you let this happen?!? I cried.  Please don't make me go through this again!  Why, with everything else that's happened to me in my life and with how little I have right now, would you do this to me?
You see, I believe everything happens for a reason, probably a little (or maybe a lot) more than I should.  I don't believe in coincidence or luck.  I don't believe bad things happen without a real purpose behind them either.  And at this particular time I prayed aloud, "What is the purpose of this?!? What good is supposed to come from this?!"  I couldn't help it; I was too distraught.  At this point I awful because I wasn't, "enduring well", or, "cheerfully" my adversity. I  felt like a spoiled child, whining, complaining, kicking and screaming my whole way through.
Looking back, I can now see that my initial response and emotions weren't because I was an unfaithful person, they were because I was a human being experiencing opposition.  God doesn't expect us to always immediately submit cheerfully to our problems.  Some people may be able to do that, and all power to 'em, but if God expected that we all do that all the time in order to be saved, then none of us would be making it to the Celestial Kingdom.
What I'm saying is that it's okay to have hard times, and to let ourselves feel our true emotions, while at the same time trusting that our Savior is walking with us, helping us all the way through, even when we may not feel Him, even when we aren't happy with our own performance. We can be scared and trust in Him at the same time. And it's going through the fear and doubt and sorrow and coming out on the other side of them; seeing that God has been there all along, and feeling the love and joy from getting to that place, that is the real lesson and gift here.
I don't know yet what the ultimate cause of my problems are, but I believe that the answer is out there.  It may come after a lot of trial and error tests, tears and smiles, disappointments and hopes.  It may be needed that I spend a certain amount of time, money and energy in order to find the answers.  In the end, I have faith that none of that will be wasted.  This will turn out.  Answers will be found, treatment set forth and, I do believe, some sort of restoration of health given.  I give this all to Him, who knows and has all the answers. He'll give them, in His time.
I hope we can all have the courage to do the same.

What great challenge caused you a lot of fear and doubt, and what did you ultimately learn from it?

At times in our life, things can become so hectic and chaotic that we forget to see the tiny miracles and blessings in our life. Our Heavenly Father is so aware of us and what we are dealing with day to day. He wants us to be happy and he wants the best for us. As we make our journey through life, we will have bad days. We will have disappointments and frustrations. There will be times we may want to give up. Stop! Look around and try to see the positive. Try to look at a horrible situation in a positive light. I promise, you will find good in every situation. Sometimes it may take a bit of deeper digging to see and understand. But our Heavenly Father will never leave us alone.

There are so many little things in which He blesses our life with. Sometimes, we don't take the time to realize how blessed we are. Life is not easy. We will be asked to do many things and endure many trials. But as long as we keep believing in faith, knowing he will provide a way, we will be blessed. Open your eyes and see your own blessings in your life. 
“[The Lord] will not permit us to fail if we do our part. He will magnify us even beyond our own talents and abilities. … It is one of the sweetest experiences that can come to a human being” Ezra Taft Benson 

Have you ever had a dream taken away from you, one which you worked your whole life to get? Even when you try your hardest to rise above what may seem the impossible? Then, when you think you have given it all you've got, a small glimpse of hope enters your life and it makes you realize that this dream, this goal you have always wanted to achieve may still be a possibility.


In my own life, I have always had goals and dreams based on gymnastics. Many things in my life have happened, making it seem impossible to accomplish what I think the Lord wants me to accomplish. In the past month, since the Olympic games, when the Woman's US Gymnastics team earned gold, I have had many thoughts racing through my head. If they can do it, why can't I? If a 37 year old German women can be incredible on vault, why not me @ 30? If the USA can win gold in Woman's Gymnastics, only the second time in history and Gabbi can be the first African American to win the individual Gold all around, why can't I do something extraordinary? Something that others may think completely impossible and ridiculously insane? I CAN!

My body is falling apart and is exhausted from the stresses placed on it. But I feel strongly that He still has a mission for me in this sport. Through Him, nothing is impossible. You must have determination and faith that He will strengthen you as long as you come to Him for help. I am so grateful for my Heavenly Father and His guiding hand, leading me the way to success and living my life in line with his will. I know I will be happiest when I do this and

"Do you look forward with an eye of faith?" Alma 5:15

"Whatsoever thing ye shall ask in faith, believing that ye shall receive it in the name of Christ, ye shall receive it." Enos 1:15
"I will grant unto thee according to thy desires, because of thy faith." Enos 1:12

These are just a few verses I came across when I was searching my scriptures. The scriptures can be so powerful and so many answers can be found just by reading its words and pondering. Then, with faith and prayer, you will find answers! 

Welcome to our blog!
Life is full of trials and adversities, some of which may seem impossible to overcome. We met in high school and although we lost contact after graduation, the Lord brought us back together for a purpose we didn't even realize for some time. We have both lived with chronic pain and health problems since we were teens, and as we've gotten older, we've developed many of the same conditions. This has only increased our capacity to understand each other and others who deal with the same challenges.
It is our hope that we can encourage others to always "Look up!" amidst the trials of their lives, for those trials are often God's mercies in disguise. We have seen the Lord's hand in our lives, and can witness that He does visit His children in their time of need.  We know that in the midst of great pain, we can have great joy, that there is sunlight through the clouds.